Jurassic World (2015)

This film is everything I hate about 21st century Hollywood.
A Franchise revival not in spirit with the franchise (this is a much louder yet much dumber film than Jurassic Park).

Trading in nostalgia (William’s theme and a CGI T-Rex are not the solo ingredients needed for a good Jurassic Park film).

Many awful scripts stitched together to make one super-awful script (the dialogue is staggeringly bad).

Waste of potentially good ideas (a serial killer dinosaur, having to create further genetic hybrids to keep audience interest).

Poor usage of CGI (the bloody gate was obvious and terrible CGI).

Every single character being a stock cliche

Misusing Chris Pratt’s comic talents.

Handwaved sexism (seriously, why the hell was she in high heels the entire time? Why was her wanting to be good at her job portrayed as a bad thing? Why was her wanting to be a career girl portrayed as a bad thing ultimately fixed in the end?).

Nonsensical story (how did the kids fix a car rotted in the jungle for decades without any petrol or tool?).

Awful action editing (I could barely understand some of the action scenes and the lapses in visual continuity didn’t help).

I’m seriously concerned that the director of this mess is helming Star Wars Episode IX.

I give it one rotting jeep, and a poorly-done CGI gate.


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